How OPEN are WE?!?

We are some huge Believers in OPEN ADOPTION. It is the road of Adoption that has felt so right with us from Day 1. We teach our boys about their history of love & don't want them to have any missing pieces of their story. 

Our oldest son is now 5 years old and is very knowledgeable on his story. Being adopted is something he is proud of. Any time he hears the name Lauren, he makes sure to tell that person that that is HIS Birth Momma's name. He loves to claim her :-)

Sawyer & HIS Lauren

 Ever since our kids were babies, their Birth Families have been with us. They are on our walls (in photos) and in our books. They are in our stories and on our computers. We want our kids to know them and love them as we do. We want our kids to feel comfortable to talk to us about their Birth Parents and feel comfortable reaching out to them whenever they want to. We want them to feel secure in their adoptions and have NO doubt just how loved they are. 

Jamison on a Date with His Amy for Birth Mother's Day!

Now we know for some this isn't ideal. For us though it is. We are very secure in our role as their parents. From early on we knew we had a choice to make in times of jealousy or insecurity. We could either succumb to it, or push past it and CHOOSE to nurture the healthy goodness of what adoption can become. Was it always easy.... No. But we never quit. 

I have heard lots of stories of Adoptive Families promising openness and then going back on their word. That kills me. I just don't get it and feel sorry for them for missing out on getting to know some really great women. (Their child's Birth Mothers) 

In order for Open Adoption to work, it requires a mutual want from everyone involved.... Birth and Adoptive Families. It requires always giving the Benefit of the Doubt, COMMUNICATION even when its hard, Respect, and they ability to sustain each other. I know I will never be our boys Biological Mother. I know I will never know what is like to have carried them inside my body and make musical harmony with our heartbeats. However even though that part of my child's life will never be me, I am SO glad and so thankful it is them. 

We truly believe if our Birth Families were not supposed to be part of our lives then our kids would have come to us directly. The relationship with a Birth Mom is unlike any other I have ever had. It is so deep and sacred. We didn't just adopt our boys, we adopted their Birth Families too... and in return they adopted us right back. I love them. I can not imagine life without them. Our relationships with them have evolved into so much more than just the strings of adoption. We remind them often that we are never going anywhere and we never will. We are permeant.  

Next week we are driving all across America and visiting both Boys Birth Families. We can't even wait!!! I talked to Sawyer's Birth Momma for an hour and a half a few days ago and we made some plans... and talked about lots of other things. 

SO how OPEN are we? We are open to all the possibilities and then some :-) There is always room for MORE Love!